Canto CXXXIV

The day that I stop being a such a dick
would cause my bardic ink well to run dry.
Did Socrates get cosy with the cliques?

Can one be an acceptable gadfly?
And no, I’m not implying I’m as great
as Socrates, I’m just trying to say

he was the greatest dick there’s been to date
and in our dickishness we’re of a feather
and I can’t live without the sweaty taste

of my own scuffed and burnished toecap leather.
You’d hate me if I became coy, content—
so goes my own hasty Apologia—

it takes a proper dick to keenly vent
the steam of constant ire into verse
and if I caused offence, it wasn’t meant.

I’m sorry. There, I said it. Kiss my arse.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. peter litton
    Jan 13, 2012 @ 01:05:15

    I think you are being too hard on yourself.

    Reply

  2. Niall O'Sullivan
    Jan 13, 2012 @ 08:25:26

    What, a hard dick? 😉

    Reply

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